La Vie de Brido

Adults at 18? 21? Really?

No doubt everyone knows, a few things in life have a minimum age limit to which you can indulge yourselves in. This includes driving and alcohol, but this minimum age limit, almost equivalent to the age of adulthood, is not very consistent amongst different countries. Inconsistencies make the classification of adults, at least from the government-legal perspective, doubtful in validity. The question popped into my head from a distantly related topic in a conversation with a friend of mine about generation gap between freshers and seniors. People of the an older generation always seem to be able to tell the inexperience of younger generations and neutrally comment them as immature. This phrase has frequently come from my mom. The situation is similar to the senior I am now; being able to feel differences in their thought processes and perspectives as “immature” - not exactly an apt adjective. So what makes us an adult, as it sounds like a word with a vague meaning to me so far. I will define an adult as someone that have the capacity to be independent and act within a boundary of acceptable moral and logical standards. (the last part is still pretty damn vague) This can only be achieved through learning via experiences and adaptation, an unquantifiable process we call maturity.

I remember a friend telling me something to which I had no reply. He said society does not really give you a choice if you want be in a society or not. There is no such thing as liberty in that sort of thing. It sounds kind of a “loner” or slightly “emo” to say, but even if humans are social animals by generalisation, it does not mean that one wants to be a responsible individual within that society by deduction. Many people have ask why not when I present the question to them, but that is beside the point, because the argument here is about the inexistent choice. So, when you reach 18, you are accountable for all your actions. I wondered who reached the consensus of 18 to be the age you become legal. Is it because that’s the approximate age, which the majority of people come out of high school and is believe to have enough moral education to behave like an adult. Then you have a problem with education, does everyone take in what is taught, does everyone attend every single class or to say even go to school. Even in the developed countries, the filmed evidence of teenagers stealing in the recent riots of the UK does not suggest moral education is even close to saturating in a 1st world country! So why do people suggest that 18 is the “coming of age”, a time when one transits into adulthood, even if you take it out of context from the legal system where things need to be exact.

Depending on experiences, one might be more mature than another. This suggests that maturation occurs at different rates, although the measurement of it will prove an impossibility. The time to reach adulthood will therefore vary, I would say some might not even reach it for their whole lives. I believe this is why chavs and NEDs came into the British vocabulary, if you consider it away from the derogatory connotations. The education and experiences simply too different between individuals. Perhaps if we look at this from scientific point of view, the human brain does not stop developing until the age of 27. One of my classmates smartly asked the question, why do people not classify that age as the legal age for things such as alcohol and make a intermediate classification between 18-27 something different. You tell me, because our lecturer didn’t know.

Back to the freshers I met this year. I would say like me they all expected themselves to be independent from now on, a false perception. This is merely proven by the fact that you do not pay for your own education. It is either your parents who does or for Scots, that means you don’t pay taxes thanks to SAAS. Secondly, they all probably thought I have become more mature after transiting through the summer holidays between the end of high school and university. You may reject this notion, but subconsciously there is going to be at least a small degree of it in your head, because I’m guilty of it. The more I got to know these people, the more I realized how well protected they were. They were all new to an environment with an expectation absolutely different from reality is. At least they are eager and keen. The concentration of their thoughts lies in the immediate or near future, but never the extended future. For god’s sake, its only been 14 years of educational misery.

The didactic comments of a mentor, whether this is your parents or someone else, about the fact that anything you do now and later will shape your path drastically does not seem to cross anyone’s mind. Things they find funny are also “childish”, just like the the thing you recall yourself laughing about when you were 6. A comment of “you’re stupid” would have sufficed. I agree that I am probably no means an adult in the eyes of people older than me, but I cannot realise what I lack in maturity, I just know its there. Everyone is ignorant in this sense, but some are more than others. So when you use the argument of “I’m an adult so I can…..” you’re really making yourself look silly.

Never met, yet humbled

Most people that I know, knows that I am doing an intercalated degree, which is basically taking a year out between 3rd and 4th year of medicine to a do a pure science degree. In the end, I will get a BMSc degree (bachelor of medical science), which is almost equivalent to the BSc. degree. During this year, on top of completing the gross anatomy I and II modules and 4 extra modules of my choosing, I also have to do a lab project that is going to be written up for assessment. This is something similar to a dissertation that is written up in the final year of all other degrees. My lab project is related to Barrett’s oesophagus, a pre-malignant (pre-cancerous) condition to cancer of the oesophagus. Through this project, I hope to learn about medical statistics and the numerous lab techniques that maybe used, including immunohistochemistry, Western blotting and real time RT-PCR. Don’t worry if you do not know what these techniques are.

My supervisor handed me a book a week ago that contains the PhD thesis of one of his students that graduated in 2010, with the aim to make me understand the science behind oesophageal cancer. It was related to my project, or to be precise, the idea of my research was solely derived from her thesis. I remembered clearly when I received the bounded and author-signed book with my two hands, I felt the pressure of my supervisor’s expectation indenting on my palms. My supervisor then said, “I want this back, because this is the signed version, you know.” I immediately understood the high quality of research recorded down in this black volume of bounded paper and its resemblance of three years of hard work by a bright student. My respect for this tome archived in my supervisor’s library grew before I even turned to a single page. From then on, I treated this book like the Holy Bible, and never once drank anything in its proximity, to prevent unintended spills and stains on the book, for which I believe if happened, will be the end of my relationship with my supervisor.

I decided to read it just this week. At first, I noticed the student’s name was written in front with silver print, italicized. Simple and not extravagant. Delicately, I flipped open the cover page and my eyes began feasting on the font with 1.5cm spacing in between lines - a typical university assessment submission format. To my surprise, the written text was not difficult to understand at all, it was “clean”. Mind my expression, but not a single word was superfluous to the descriptions made and the presentation of information was solid and logical. I had the impression that I was reading into her mind, just the simplistic way she knew her topic of study, and through these unartistic non-fiction lines, I came to know her. She was thorough and analytical. The way she broke down each topic of significant difficulty to the fundamentals, gave me an epiphany of something another supervisor once told me about learning medicine. He told me, “Keep it simple, and that’s the best.”

I can’t help but read through the pages with admiration and uncontrollably compared it with my own work. I realize that my knowledge or at least the way I acquire knowledge is by far more crude to her systematic approach. The project essays I wrote, which I thought were well written now seem like a poor quality piece of work. If this was a game of chess, she would be getting a checkmate without a losing single piece. I felt defeated but not depressed. This is a sudden realisation that there is still more to improve in terms of my scientific writing and the need to be more critical with my learning.

With such respect to this now PhD doctor, I decided to search through PubMed, a government search archive for medical research journals. I found only 2 published papers by the same person. It hit me that even such a person with dedication to complete a 3 year  PhD and the brilliance to come up with a novel research topic, is unable to make a prominent standing in the scientific community. I could not help it but think about the intelligent people in the field of science. All elegantly using their brains to the full potential, but not find anything massively significant to this world and thus remained unheard of. They may die without knowing the answer to the question they have pursued for their whole life, with a deep feeling of yearning to know. A wish unfulfilled, when to them, whoever finds the answer does not even matter anymore. It is unfortunate, as I believe they could have all been great people. With this in mind, I will raise my glass to you, someone I haven’t even met, who has earned my respect just from your research thesis. Dr. K Blackett, I am truly humbled.

Wingbase jumping and proximity flying - balls of steel

Recently, my flatmate pal, who also studies medicine, and I were looking through some youtube videos and stumbled upon a few posts related to base jumping and proximity flying. We literally had one of those “jaw drop” moments just by watching the two videos below (Please watch them in order). Apparently to do proper proximity flying you have to at least overcome your fear of falling, then master flying with the flight suit as if it is second nature, and fly through those canyons approximately 50-100 times, knowing the terrain before you can proximity fly. This is definitely something I want to do maybe out of a plane before I die, because the risk of fatal accidents of proximity flying is 1 in 60 apparently.

Zero Gravity

Wingsuit Basejumping - The Need 4 Speed

Dissection, cadavers and us

Today was the second time I have stepped into the dissection room and placed blade to dead flesh. I have been doing this for the past 3 years, so it is really nothing new to me. However, this year I have been joined by BSc. Anatomy and BSc. Anatomy and Physiology students, who have not really been dissecting at all prior to this year. I come to realize the different mind set science students have compared to us, medics. I also realize that my perspective on dissection of a cadaver has changed since I started as a medical student in first year. Indeed, there are many books that write about entering the “Anatomy Room”, so reading those would perhaps give you a more descriptive account of emotions experienced. However, I’ll write my own experience here in short, because a lot of people who know me or start to know me always ask what it is like to cut open a human being. I’ll talk about surgical incisions on living people perhaps in another post.

The topic of the day was the lungs, and the thorax all over again, something I have already learnt in first year. The first thing I heard from my fellow colleagues when I reached the cadaver table was about their feeling of guilt after dissecting for the first time on Monday. They felt astonished that they were cutting a human being and one of their parents even started getting sick over the phone when told about the practical. Monday was the nth time I have dissected so I kind of felt distant from their feelings and just managed a grin and light laugh to show I am listening rather than agreeing. However, this made me think of first year, when I first entered the dissection room the 1st week of university. I don’t remember feeling guilty at all, but I do recall I was in disbelief that I had done something like this at 18. After that, I never felt the same disbelief again, as I was fascinated by the human body. Guilt was never in the picture. You might think I am a heartless person, but to think that the cadavers are people who donated their body for the continuation of medical education and study of the human body, I believe feeling guilty is something that would disappoint their intentions and sacrifice. I would rather concentrate in learning about the human body, to show that I treasure this resource they have provided and also respecting their final wishes, which perhaps is an extra bit of meaning to their lives. For, through us, they would become immortal in a Shakespearean elegant way, because we would soon then teach our knowledge on to the next generation of medics, scientists and anyone that may be required of such knowledge.

One of my fellow dissection table friends also got kind of sick on the first day and did not even touch the cadaver, something that I also could not understand but can sympathise. I think when I first dissected, fear of ruining structures within the body that I need to keep intact, much like a surgical procedure, was more prominent than fear of touching the cadaver. In fact, I think I was too fascinated after doing the first incision to even think about if the cadaver is gross at all. In my opinion, it is not gross at all. After all, you do not think your own body is disgusting, you do not think a dead skinned chicken before it is cooked abhorring either, so why think that way of a cadaver. I cannot comprehend in that sense. They were once human too, and thinking of them as gross is more disrespectful than anything else. So what do I feel now about dissecting cadavers? An enjoyable activity I would say. I think of it as a specimen, not a human being because its life have been robbed from it through nature’s course. Yet, I still respect it to be once human and a person that was once loved, once lived, once who was like anyone else.

A lot of people ask if there is still blood in the cadaver, and the answer is yes, clotted blood much like scabs you get when you get a cut - a platelet-fibrin clot. Some people ask if the smell of the cadaver smells like rotten flesh. It does not smell like that at all because of the embalming fluid used to preserve the body, which in my case is the smell of formaldehyde. Some people also ask if I look at humans and even people close to you as less of a human and more like a machine, because of your learning experience. I would have said no, because if so my job would be a lot easier, as I would not need to ask about your worries with regards to your symptoms and sympathise with sick patients. In fact, if I answered you truthfully, then I would have rhetorically asked you why I am even bothering to talk to you? As you can see, I am not any different from any other person.

Medics might have a different perspective to things, but that’s just like saying everyone takes on different views of things in life. An analogy would be someone being able to believe in god and someone who cannot. It’s only such a difference that makes us able to cut open a human, nothing more.

Image taken from: http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2005/08/photogalleries/cadavers_exhibition_museum/index.html